Because I could only explain this to God...

Dear God,

Thank you for providing for the 10 crazy white KJs that live in Kisumu, Kenya. You have blessed me so much; and I don't even know why. I walk down the street and forget I'm a Mzungu. I just see people, people that you have created to be beautiful no matter their circumstances.

Every day that I am in this land I love, I meet one more child I physically can't help. Because I can't hold every one. God, I need YOU to hold them and remind me that you are strong enough. God, American boys don't break my heart, little African kids do.

My one love.

You say you're a father to the fatherless.
You say you watch everyone while they sleep and protect them.
You say you will set the prisoners free.

Today I held your son Joseph who is four. His two year old sister sat near to me. His 16 year old sister was close. We sat inside prison walls. I bounced this bundle of energy on my lap and all I could manage to whisper was: "Jesus has a plan for your life. He loves you when no one else does." 

Because God you know no language barriers. But how can you allow hundreds of kids to be confined to a jail with the clothes on their back when they have committed no crime? How can the parents run away and a grandmother throw the kids on the street? How do you knit my heart to little Joseph's so we both cry when I have to walk away? I know you have a plan. Remind me that all I need to do is love them like you would if you walked into that Juvenile detention centre. Somehow you will teach us all a lesson through this.

This morning I turned around and saw the priceless Alice. Probably in her teens. The Kenyan people don't know what is wrong, but You do. You know she has what we call Downs Syndrome. She has lived inside these walls without love for three years now. I remember holding her hand last year. All she does as the preacher tells the story is weep next to me. My eyes started to sting as I reach to rub her back. I know she is physically abused there with no way to tell anyone. I know the only reason she is there is because her family doesn't know what's wrong with her and they don't want or need to find out. Because apparently dumping your child on the street is an option. All she wants to do is hold my hand and sing some songs. How can you confine her there when there are so many who could love her in the right ways? How do you let your child stay that way? Because you think she's strong. She is strong because she has You. She stays there because You alone are strong enough.

God, My 17 year old friend who works at Agape has lived on the streets since he was nine. He has no "family" to spend Christmas with. He doesn't go on normal 17 year old social outings because he lives on the road. You call us to live our dreams and follow you. How can someone do that when so confined? You can because YOU live in him and tell him circumstances don't control his future. He asks me every day what I have learned from your word. He has made me realize that you are a God who loves the sinner and hates the sin. You are God who loves when we feel we have nothing worth loving. Protect him this night as I sleep under a bed net and he sleeps under a shanty.

What about Arnold, God? He is so dear to you. I haven't seen him in three days and all I can do is pray that the slum has treated him well. I know you protect him. I know he has a Father in you even though his earthly one fails him. But I also know he is a lost 13 year old boy who just needs to realize that he has a savior. Remind him.

What about eight year old William? He runs from his past. You know those razor blades don't rule his life...but to him they do. God, find him inside of your arms tonight and shake him upside the head. He needs to know that his home is in his real father, YOU.

Protect Kevin who wants to live on the streets and Brian who hides behind his smile and Geoferry who ran to live the street life. Help Derick and Lawrence and Abraham and Isaiah and Tracy and Laura and George and Siki and Humphrey. Find homes for the fatherless and make them know they are special because You are special.

Our world is broken, and YOU are the only one who can fix it.

"I know I'm not strong enough to be everything that I'm suppose to be.
I give up. I'm not strong enough.

Hands of mercy, won't you cover me? God, right now I'm asking you to be: Strong Enough."